quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize
