It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
