Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
