what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
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