He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Randomize
