im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
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