Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
