Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
I want to have your abortion
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Randomize
