Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
All the doctor said was why
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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