I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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