No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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