I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives