Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
