Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Is her dick bigger than yours?
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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