and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
