i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
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I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
She told me I should be a condom model.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
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Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
And then he peed in my hair
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