so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize