My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
Randomize