worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
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