just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
