There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Randomize
