Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
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