I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I am midnight drunk by noon
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Randomize
