there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
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