I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I'm way too hungover for life right now
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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