MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
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