We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
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