fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
that may or may not have been my penis.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
