Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
is wine microwaveable?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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