Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
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