those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
