Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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