I won't be sarcastic... just naked
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
