He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
