Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
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