your thong is hanging out like whoa
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
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