This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I wish I only lived at night.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
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