So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Randomize
