You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
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