I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Randomize
