if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
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What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
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PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
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