My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize