The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
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