Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
He did a backflip because drugs
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