it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Randomize
