You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
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