So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
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