How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize
