It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Come on in and take your pants off
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize