and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
Randomize
